The summer of 2009, my body stopped losing weight after a year of eating nutrient-rich, whole plant foods. I had lost one hundred pounds of inflammatory tissues, and I felt great for the first time in my life!
My health biomarkers were excellent.
I felt strong and vibrant.
I was so happy.
However, I was still allegedly ten pounds overweight according to an ideal weight calculation. (It was the sum of a base number plus additional pounds per inch of height.)
So, for the next fourteen years, I desperately tried everything to achieve a smaller body: restricting food, fasting, intermittent fasting to shed those ten pounds. . .but it only rebounded into the development of body dysmorphia and an eating disorder.
Health took a back seat to a number on the scale.
I began viewing optimal health, or lack thereof, through the lens of that arbitrary ideal weight calculation. I became anxious; fearing serious health complications as a result of my failure to reach that smaller number. I was diagnosed with anxiety for the first time in my life.
Weight loss programs are heavily marketed, especially this time of year.
If you’ve joined weight loss challenges, weight loss boot camps, resets, jumpstarts, detoxes, intermittent fasting programs, or similar weight reduction diets. . .be aware of the potential risks.
Dieting and repetitive weight checking can quickly rebound into chronic overeating and binge eating; followed by more food restriction; dieting rules/rituals; and/or purging by vomiting, fasting, abusing laxatives, or over exercising.
Health and well-being are so much more than a number on the scale.
These pictures were taken in the summer of 2009 after a year focused on EATING instead of losing weight.
Emily Boller, wife, mother, artist, and author of Starved to Obesity, is on a mission to bring awareness to the suffocating and potentially deadly trap of diet culture and eating disorders—and to bring understanding and compassion to those suffering in silence.
In her free time, she loves to grow flowers and vegetables—and can homemade soups.