When I was a young child, I heard my parents talk about the “Moonies” cult; how it brainwashed college-age students who then needed deprogrammed. I think having older teens in college at the time piqued their interest in the topic of cults.
Fast forward more than five decades later, I’m intrigued by the number of cult stories I’ve listened to on various podcasts in recent years. It’s provided me with insights into the world high-control groups with charismatic leaders. I’ve also listened to hours of educational teachings by experts who’ve studied cults for years—and who’ve helped many individuals escape from them. All of this information combined has caused me to recognize cults’ main commonalities.
Basically, cults are communities of people with excessive devotion to a particular person and belief system—and they are often centered around a charismatic leader.
Cults are laced everywhere in plain sight. And many times, those who think they’d never become involved in a cult. . .are the most susceptible to being recruited into one.
Humans thrive in community with others. It’s a good thing.
However, if it becomes controlling under the auspices of a charismatic leader, it warrants further exploration.
Here are a few questions to ask:
1. Is the group led by a charismatic leader (who may also have an inner circle) who has a lot of influence and loyal followers? Is the leader incapable of being wrong? In fact, does the leader believe everyone else is wrong? Does the leader believe they are the only one holding the keys to spiritual growth and maturity, eternal destiny, healthy relationships, marital bliss, financial wealth, optimal health and well-being, to name a few? Many times, the ideologies are contrary to popular, mainstream beliefs.
2. Does the leader shape many aspects of the followers’ lives through thought reform? For example: Do they instruct followers in who they should date/marry; or how they should discipline their children; spend their time and money; what/when they should eat or not eat; or even how much they should weigh? Does the leader have the solution for most every question a follower may ask? Does the leader discourage the opinions and ideas of others outside the group? Does the leader teach followers to primarily follow only their guidance?
3. Do followers put the leader on a pedestal as the only source of truth and knowledge?
4. Do members of the group have an “us-versus-them” mentality? In order words, do members believe they are superior to others based on their knowledge and choices?
5. Do members eventually become isolated from mainstream beliefs or family/friends outside the community? Do they select friends primarily from within the group who also have the same beliefs?
6. Is there excessive devotion to the leader and the group? Is there extreme commitment to the teachings? Do members of the group ever feel they are never good enough; or must constantly strive to meet unrealistic standards?
7. Does the leader love-bomb by using excessive praise and flattery? Does the leader allow access to them as a reward for loyalty? Does the leader use fear-mongering as a tactic to manipulate compliance?
8. Is the leader accountable to anyone outside the group? Is there lack of financial transparency or outside accountability to verify the integrity of the leader?
9. Are followers able to ask questions that may contradict the leader’s teachings or ideals that may not be adding up with what they’ve experienced or learned? Are followers discouraged from using critical thinking skills or seeking answers outside the group?
10. Is public shaming involved if doubt is expressed? Are dissenters cut off and excommunicated from the group?
If any of these questions resonate with you. . .you may be in a cult.
Knowledge enables better decision-making skills and will keep you safe from high-control groups.
Here’s a list of a few of the podcasts I’ve listened to in recent years.
Escaping NXIVM
A Little Bit Culty
Let’s Talk About Sects
Groomed.Connect
Was I in a Cult?
Inside the Tribe
Butterflies and Bravery
Call Bethel
Heaven’s Gate
Sounds Like a Cult
Emily Boller, wife, mother, artist, and author is on a mission to create expressive works of art in her lifetime; and to bring awareness to the potentially harmful traps of diet-wellness culture. In her free time, she loves to chase sunrises, grow flowers and vegetables, and can homemade soups.